Elementary EDucation

            My daughter's eating disorder was discovered 3 weeks after her 7 th birthday . I wish someone could have prepared me for how our lives would change. After we were turned away from an eating disorder center because Laina was too young for their program, I did Family-Based Treatment (FBT) on my own, with the help of the internet and advice from a friend. This journey could have been easier with certain pieces of knowledge.             Such as: This is going to be awful. Each and every day. Multiple times a day. I was so caught off guard by how utterly difficult it was going to be to sit with my child every 3 hours and coach her through each bite. “Keep eating.” “Chew and swallow.” “Take a bite.” I have said these words thousands of times. And it was horrible each and every time. Instructing a child to eat, chew, swallow and repeat when they have previously been able to do these things wi...

What happens when your young child is diagnosed with an eating disorder?  Well, if you are me, you put on your heaviest boxing gloves and go to town beating yourself up!  I regretted everything I’d done raising her for 7 years.  I regretted everything I hadn’t done in those 7 years.  I went over and over every memory I had, searching for the terrible things I must have done or neglected to do.  Maybe if I’d given her more candy, she’d be fine.  Or perhaps I gave her too much candy.  Maybe I should have given her more choice of foods.  Or perhaps I offered her too much choice in what to eat.  Maybe we shouldn’t have gone to so many restaurants.  Or maybe the food I prepared at home was inadequate.  I really spent hours and hours torturing myself about how and why this was my fault.             I flashed back to holding her in my arms in the hospital when she was one day old....

Laina was always on the move.  In utero, she did non-stop backflips, karate kicks, and interpretive dances.  She started walking at 10 months old, and never looked back.  I often joke that she never sat down, not even in the bathroom.  And her personality matched!  No child has ever been as witty, sharp, determined, and curious as Laina.  She did not march to the beat of her own drum; she composed her score and played it on instruments of her own invention.              Her full-force zest was the same with food.  Toddler Laina ate everything placed near her, including what was on our plates.  Only one food was banished from her menu: green beans.  She ate spinach, avocados, swiss cheese, and everything else under the sun, including a stew I made with tomatillo salsa.  Her moto seemed to be the more flavor and variety, the better.  Her eating was a parent’s dream. ...

      More than a year ago, when I became aware that my then 7 year old child had an eating disorder, I combed the internet for any articles, any advice, any help, any way to feel like I wasn’t alone in this. What I found was a lot of great information for parents of adolescents, teens, and adults with eating disorders. Every once in a while, I’d find some gem like “…and it can happen in kids as young as 6.” Okay, but what can I glean from that partial sentence? I know it is possible because I’m living it! Most of the ED content I could find was geared towards kids 12 and older, which is the typical time when eating disorders are diagnosed. We did not fit the mold of who has an eating disorder and when it presents itself.      This isn’t uncommon for me. There are precious few molds that I fit. I did not want a traditional diamond engagement ring. I have trouble with following instructions without modifying them along the way. I change default set...